The Big Question

Posted on October 23, 2003 by kevinyezbick

Monsieur wants to know “How are we out of toliet paper?”

I have a few theories as to why we’re out of toilet paper…

  • I’ve been sick lately.
  • I bought the good shit this past time – Charmin with Aloe — so maybe we’ve been a little overzealous in its usage.
  • When I said I’ve been sick – I meant with a head cold – and we don’t have any kleenex in the house — so…(but don’t rule out the other kind of sick that you were thinking about – because there have been plenty of those morning surprises too…)

    • That’s about all I can come up with for now — and I haven’t seen Monsieur since I got home late last night from the bachelor/bachelorette party — so — If any of you can think of any more answers for “How are we out of toliet paper?” — lemme know… Star – I’m counting on you.

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    6 Responses to The Big Question

    1. Mr. P'body says:
      October 23, 2003 at 12:20 pm

      Never rule out Toliet Paper Gnomes…just as sneaky as their Underpants Gnome counterparts.

    2. yezbick says:
      October 23, 2003 at 12:38 pm

      I haven’t seen any gnomes — I guess they’re supposed to be kinda stealth — but we do have a frog with an orb in the backyard…

    3. star says:
      October 23, 2003 at 3:48 pm

      Well, silly, of course I know the answer. Auburn has been planning ahead for my halloween costume party by trying out different toilet paper custumes.
      First, he tried out man covered with toilet paper.
      Next, he tried out man covered with toilet paper with banana hanging out of ass.
      Then, his personal favorite, man covered with toilet paper making love to gay roomate.

    4. Tony the Mechanic says:
      October 23, 2003 at 5:18 pm

      Kevin Yezbick ! Did Star just OUT you in front of God and everybody ? OH MY GOD ! Why didn’t you tell us you were living in sin with a gay roomate who likes to cover himself with toilet paper , put bananas up his arse , and then make sweet passionate love to you…all the while grunting and groaning as sticky sweat drips from his loins. TEll us , does this have anything to do with the Big Gay Moustache Party ?

      I am shocked.
      Shocked and …well…just plain shocked…. Maybe you should post the national flag of Yezbickistan again .

    5. Anonymous says:
      October 26, 2003 at 8:04 pm

      Note to self: buy more bananas. make sure they’re ripe.

    6. Anonymous says:
      October 27, 2003 at 5:38 pm

      ammended note to self:
      1.)buy bananas
      2.)convince world I’m not gay…must marry Liza Minelli.